Here at the TCK/PFO training, we’ve had sessions discussing cultural issues and third culture kids (TCKs). We also have small group meetings and Bible studies. I’ve met some staff from BFA, which is exciting – these people will be part of my home away from home.
Many of the topics in the sessions are the same ones I encountered during my orientation for student teaching overseas. Rather than being boring and repetitive, I am discovering that it is really helpful to gain a new perspective on my past experiences, and use the combined knowledge to help me in the future.
The past couple days, I have begun to realize that leaving home is not without cost. In the devotional this morning, the speaker quoted 1 Chronicles 21:24 – “But King David said to Ornan, ‘No, but I will buy them for the full price. I will not take for the Lord what is yours, nor offer burnt offerings that cost me nothing.” My obedience to God is sacrificial – I have offered Him my life as a living sacrifice. Part of this sacrifice means leaving home. For all of you friends and family out there reading this, I love you and I miss you already!
When I was in Brussels, my home was still in West Chicago, and I knew I would get to be home for Easter to see my family. Moving to Germany will be different. It will be my new home (eventually). I will no longer be able to say, “I live in West Chicago.” I take comfort in the truth that Jesus spoke: “Everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or lands, for my name’s sake, will receive a hundredfold and will inherit eternal life” (Matthew 19:29). It is for the sake of His precious name that I go. Ultimately, the uprootedness I will feel is a reminder that I will never be as at home on earth as I will be in Heaven, my true home, as an adopted child of God.
There are risks to leaving, and there are costs, but the important thing to remember is that the safest place to be is in the center of God’s will. Though my home seems like the safest place right now, I trust that God will always be with me, and my home is in His will.
I have a hard time admitting to myself when I am grieving, hurting, or struggling. In Brussels, I did not realize all the times when I was missing home. I literally do not recognize loss since I have experienced so little loss and pain in my life. This week has given me a chance to think back on what I lost in Brussels (i.e. the last semester of college with my friends; being around people who know me for who I really am). Though I experienced loss (which I now recognize – it hurts!), the experience was positive because I believe it was in God’s will for me to be there. It prepared me in so many ways to teach at BFA.
In Germany, I will have to deal with my own losses and the cost of ministry overseas, but most of the students will have experienced far more loss and grief than I can ever understand. Most kids in boarding schools have to deal with the (temporary) loss of their parents. They also grieve the seemingly permanent loss of friends as they leave for an indefinite amount of time. As TCKs, stability in relationships is really important. I will never be able to completely identify with the emotional costs on a TCK, but at least now I recognize that they are dealing with loss on a much deeper level from having to say goodbye to so many people and places every year; knowing this, I hope to be available to the students to listen as they vent their frustrations and grief as they themselves go through transitions, but at the same time valuing them for the rich experiences they have had!
Wow, Jill! That is some tough stuff to deal with. I’m so glad that this training is helping you to gain a different perspective. I am praying for you while you are there, and hope that God will continue to reveal himself to you. 🙂
Well articulated and thought out. Often in churches you hear ‘you can be a missionary too!’ by which they mean, continue living as you are but tell your friends and neighbors about Jesus. While this is of course a necessary responsibility of a Christian, it is distinct from being a missionary and tends to undermine the true sacrifices that missionaries make. My mom was an MK, and it was very hard on her family, with lasting effects to this day. I appreciate your willingness to think about and experience these issues, and I will be praying for you as you support the TCKs musically and emotionally.