jill.musick

Today after lunch, Emily started cleaning while I started making hummus. Suddenly, a small piece of Styrofoam bounced off my shoulder. I turned to see Emily’s impish grin as she brandished a slab of the lightweight packaging from our new TV. Not to be outdone, I grabbed another slab of Styrofoam and we were off to war! It was an epic battle that left wreckage strewn across our kitchen floor. Who won, you may inquire? Well, that depends on who you ask. What determines the winner? Who has more synthetic white fluff on their person at the end? Who dealt more blows? Who dealt deadlier blows?

In the end, I think the Styrofoam won. Emily and I were left picking up the pieces while the Styrofoam gloated about its evasive techniques. We will be finding little white specks around the house for the next few months. The good news: it fits better in the Gelbe Sacks when crushed and mangled than when it was whole. Perhaps the Styrofoam will be conquered at last… by German recycling and the Vacuum!

Saturdays are always interesting. It’s a grab-bag kind of day. Monday through Friday is predictable; there’s a schedule at school and with evening activities. Sunday is routine with church in the morning and soccer in the evening with relaxation in the afternoon. But Saturday…. this mysterious day is the one day I can always count on to bring unexpected adventures into my life. Sure, there are the routines like running, grocery shopping, cleaning the house, doing laundry, and attempting to complete lesson plans for the upcoming week, but there’s still room for other adventures.

Yesterday was no exception. I returned from my friend Katrina Custer’s house, when Emily announced that the washing machine was not working. There was a load of laundry in there, but it had stopped with about 32 minutes left (the “short” version of a wash cycle is 60-70 minutes long). I pulled out the manual and discovered that “C2” meant that our beloved washing machine was having difficulty draining. The advice from the manual: Check the hose for kinks or cracks; check some other hose for blockages; in other words, figure out the problem yourself.

So Emily pulled out the washer, tore off the duct tape adhering the hose to the pipe in the wall, and poked around while I handed her flash lights, buckets, and pliars. Though we didn’t find any blockage, the machine finished the cycle when she reattached the hose into the wall. We’ll see what happens next time we do a load of laundry.

Just after reattaching the hose, our ride showed up – we were going out for the evening! Marit and I had looked up the schedule of performances at the Freiburg Conservatory of Music, and we decided that a student recital would be a refreshing reminder of our time at Wheaton when we attended recitals 2-3 times each week.

Four of us went: Marit, Natalie (Marit’s roommate who also plays violin), Emily, and me. For about an hour and a half, we were in musical bliss; what could be better than a senior cello recital?

Bach, Schumann, Crumb, and Brahms – it was an excellent recital, and left us feeling contented and at peace.

Then we went home and Emily chopped up our Christmas tree. Actually, she sawed off the branches so we can burn it later. All in a Saturday!

After a wonderful Christmas at home with family and friends, I boarded a plane and headed back to my other home in Germany.

At the staff breakfast, interim director Phil Peters passed the baton (literally and figuratively) to the new director, Scott Jones. In his opening speech to the staff and faculty of BFA, he challenged us to give ourselves grace in failure. Failure is in fact a part of learning; we cannot grow without making mistakes. Thomas Edison said of failure, “I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward.” Giving ourselves permission to fail allows us the freedom to try new techniques and strategies, to improve our craft as teachers.

The only way we can succeed is to be willing to fail. The only way to be strong is to admit weakness. We can in fact boast in weakness.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. ¹⁰ For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

– 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

In church today the sermon was about God’s strength in weakness. Pastor Markus Gulden encouraged us that in our sorrow we discover God’s grace. We often think that God uses us in spite of our weakness, but instead, he can use us because we are weak. We are not heroes, but willing tools in the hand of the master Craftsman.

This year is a season of discovering God’s grace in my weakness. The theme for the school year is “Only Grace.” This Friday’s chapel speaker talked about “Do-overs” – we all want a second chance to succeed. God gives us that second chance by His grace.

In teaching my guitar class, I am vulnerable with the students – I let them know that I am not an experienced guitar player; as I admit my weaknesses and failures in my attempts to learn guitar, they gain a freedom to also make mistakes as they learn a new instrument. In some ways this year, my greatest weakness has become my greatest strength. My weakest subject is guitar because I only had a semester class in college. Yet God has given me an incredible amount of opportunities to speak into the lives of my guitar students! In allowing myself to admit my weakness, fail a few times, and re-learn how to learn a new instrument, God has worked something powerful in my life and in the lives of my students (while having a great time!).

Guitar Class at the Christmas Concert:

This week we started a new semester; I have a new group of guitar students. Some are nervous about failing, others are afraid their fingers won’t be coordinated, others think they don’t have any rhythm. But all of us will work hard and boast in our weaknesses as we learn and grow together. Hopefully we will all catch a glimpse of God’s power this semester!

What is a life in two worlds? When am I truly awake? When I’m “there,” my family is a picture tacked on the wall, taunting me with the hollow echo of memories. My younger self smiles at me as if to say it was all a dream, “there” is my reality.

When I’m “there,” my reality is music, teaching, hills, castles, coffee, darkness, light. When I’m “here,” my reality is living breathing family, friends, church, and flat hard ground. Mom’s hugs, Dad’s theological lectures, David’s radioactive hair, Erich’s sweet ride. When I’m “here,” the friends of “there” are relegated to dreams and shadowy Skype conversations.

When I’m “there,” I try to hold on to “here” because my roots are “here.” My sense of being, my identity was “here.” All that molded my life for 22 years was “here.”

But what of the fantastical journey of “there,” which seems so dream-like and distant now? Surely my identity has taken on a new flavor in a new place. Now the tables are reversed. Now I am “here,” but I cling to fading bits of “there.” As comforting as “here” is, my heart longs for the adventure, the unknown, the discovery of “there.”

But it won’t be long before “there” becomes “here.” I’m not sure how  I feel about that.

Home is where the heart is; my heart is not in a place any more or it would be torn in two.

My home is in Christ. From the safety of His arms, I can move from “here” to exotic “there,” never feeling lost or losing my identity, my security, my home.

The last month has flown by. Between Christmas parties, concerts, travel, and spending quality time with friends old and less old, I haven’t had time to blog! I’ll try to give a brief update of all the Christmas events at BFA.

Christmas Banquet (in November) is a chance for students and staff to dress up and eat a nice meal together. Guys are impressed by the girls’ hair…

Orchestra Christmas Party – All the orchestras met together to eat pizza, watch the original Grinch movie, exchange white elephant gifts, and play sculpting charades.

Emily and I got a Christmas tree from a farm in Sitzenkirch. We picked out the 10 year-old tree and the farmer cut it down for us!

Some staff members had a Pinterest Christmas Party to share recipes and enjoy some good food.

Nursing home – the High School Orchestra played at a local nursing home. Vivaldi’s Winter was the highlight!

Emily and I had a Christmas party for our small group. The girls decorated our Christmas tree, made gingerbread cookies, cut snowflakes, watched part of the newer Grinch movie, and did another white elephant gift exchange. It was a blast!

Paper snowflakes from the small group party decorate my office:

Kandern’s Christmas market was smaller this year than in years past. It was only open one day before I left. Emily and I went and roasted bread on a stick, then sang Christmas carols by candlelight.

The last Friday of classes was entertaining. There was hot chocolate before school, kids wore pajamas to class, the song “Friday” was blasted over the intercom between every passing period, and a couple students gave the announcements. Orchestra practiced in the auditorium to get ready for the Christmas concert. It was a convenient place for a Christmas tree photo!

On that Saturday, the entire school went to Freiburg to do Christmas shopping at the Christmas Market downtown.

         
Christmas Concert day finally arrived. I took up 2 chairs with all my stuff! The concert went really well. Marit’s beginners had great posture and have learned a lot in a semester! Guitar class played comical selections such as Rudolph and Feliz Navidad. One of my students had the entire audience in stitches when she told the story of Rudolph. The Intermediate Orchestra has made lots of progress, especially since lots of them were beginners last year!  High School Orchestra had a more mature sound and wowed the audience by playing  Vivaldi’s ‘Winter’ from “The Four Seasons.” You can see part of the High School Orchestra’s performance here.

The night before I flew out, Kara Stuckey gave a masterclass for the students. Kara is the daughter of Peggy Stuckey, the previous string teacher at BFA. A friend of hers also gave a talk on string quartets and explained Rondo form in a creative way. It was an instructive and enjoyable evening.

Thursday morning, December 15, I took a picture of the countdown board and headed off for home!

In guitar class, I assigned a song-writing project. All of the kids put effort into this – a song is something very personal because it has to come from your heart, they told me. Some of them had wonderful melodies in their head, but they couldn’t find a beat. Others had a rhythm that fit well with their words, but they couldn’t find a melody. Others had everything all figured out – except they had no idea how to write it down on staff paper!

Though it was a challenging project, I was pleased with the results. Here is a song a student wrote based on 1 Corinthians 13. I put selected verses from 1 Corinthians so you can hear how her song lyrics matched with the chapter.

1 Corinthians 13 from Jill Musick on Vimeo.

Last week the topic of forgiveness came up in 1st period devotions. ‘I need to know more about the importance of forgiveness. How to let go of bitterness built up against another.’

During one class period, I read the story of the unforgiving servant in Matthew 18. As a class, we discussed who each character represented. The master was God, the first servant is us, and the second servant is anyone we need to forgive. In this parable, the master and servant are asked to forgive debts. We usually don’t have lots of debts against one another, but we do hold other things against people. The first step in forgiving someone else is counting the cost. What did the person take from you? If not money, did they take your pride? Your reputation? Your time? Energy? In order to forgive the person, you have to acknowledge what they took from you and absolve them of all responsibility to pay you back.

During the next devotional time, we all took pieces of paper and wrote on the top the “cost” – what we have been holding against another person, or what they took from us. Then I read Ephesians 5:4  and said that we tend to verbally abuse someone if we are angry with them, but rather than crude joking or foolish talk we should be thankful. So on the bottom part of the sheet of paper, we all wrote down a “thankful” list – things about the other person or the situation. Then I encouraged everyone to, in their own time and place, get rid of the half of paper with bitter thoughts on it, and when tempted to be angry with a person they should remind themselves of the “thankful” list.

We are to give thanks in all circumstances, including when someone has offended us or hurt us. No matter the offense, our deepest gratitude can stem from the forgiveness and grace He has already given us in Christ!

Living in Europe, it’s not hard to have multicultural meals. One time we had French toast with Canadian syrup, Irish butter, and Costa Rican coffee made in a French press. We regularly get French and Swiss foods at the grocery store (in addition to German products) since the countries are so close. But this month, we’ve been eating entire meals from different continents!

Last Wednesday, the small group girls cooked a Korean dinner for us. Delicious! We had soup, egg on rice, tuna patties, and fried mushroom patties. It’s impossible to describe the flavor – just trust me that it tasted good!

For Independent Living class (basically Home Ec), a couple kids cooked an Italian dinner for us last Monday. We had tortellini tomato soup, pasta carbonara, and (not Italian) lemon angel food cake.

On Friday I was craving Mexican food, so I made Chipotle burritos. It was amazing. It may technically be American food, but either way it’s international!

Today, a Dutch student came over and cooked Chinese food (she grew up partly in China, so she knew how to make it the real way). I don’t remember the names – she said they translated to things like “Vegetable with thinly sliced meat” and “Vegetable with square meat.”

Then we made caramel apples and tried to eat them with chopsticks. That was humorous.

Maybe we should make some German food since we’re living in Germany…..

Learning a new language can be a daunting task. It’s fun to watch Emily take her first steps toward learning German. She’s taking several good actions, such as going to German church to be immersed in the sound of the language.

She recently bought a children’s story book. It’s a good place to start! We enjoyed reading about Frederick der Maus. Once we were done with cute mice telling stories about summer days, we moved on to German history. Actually, I moved on while Emily continued to look at the pictures in the Frederick book.

Keep it up, Emily – one day you’ll understand the stuff in my book (even if I read it in an Alemannisch accent)!